You guys, I miss blogging. I know this platform is pretty much dead, at least it feels like it started dying out a few years ago... and social media like instagram + facebook has made it so easy to share life in bite size pieces within minutes. Blogging takes time, time that I usually feel like I don't have anymore. But I still miss it. I feel like I come back into this space every few months with a renewed attempt to start back up again, and then life. Life happens. And this may be another case, but then again, maybe I can find a way to make it ease back into my life. I miss the old days of blogging when I really felt like community, and I created some of the raddest friendships b/c of it. I mean, that is still happening over on ig + fb too, but something about the blog world felt so special about 5 years ago or so. All of that to say, I'm popping in here to blog today. Will it be another 5 months before I do again? Maybe. But maybe it will be tomorrow, who knows?
Somehow, I now have a 2 year old. How did that even happen? I'm still not sure. But it did. Ava has been literally the best thing to happen to me, and to James. She has changed the meaning of life in so many ways for me. I let alot of things go over the past 3 years. Some of it is returning, and some of it isn't. Some just looks different than it used, and that is ok. I've become alot less attached to things and the way they go. Motherhood has definitely taught me to go with the flow as much as possible.
For the past few months I have felt like I am going through another deep transition in life. They seem to come in waves, and usually occur around eclipse seasons and retrogrades for me. We are currently in the thick of that season and I definitely feel it. Some long needed healing came into my life recently by the grace of the universe and I feel enormously grateful to have had the space to clear my throat chakra of years of debris. I was reminded that things are not always as they seem, that letting go and cutting cords sometimes requires another perspective, and that women are truly fucking bad ass resilient creatures and that is so empowering. I also was able to give myself more forgiveness for the past, to love others deeper than before, to feel a tremendous amount of compassion for another and to gain my inner confidence back in the face of feeling small. It's amazing what can happen when we get over the fear of opening up and come together to heal wounds.
I feel like I have been in search of my old self for a while now. But maybe I have just been looking to find my new self within this new phase of life. It's taking looking alot deeper, past my extra body weight, my clothes that don't fit right, my constantly messy hair + floors. I'm peeling back the layers continually, being able to see myself through my inner light the way others do. It's not always easy, I'll admit.
Already after writing this, I really do want to get back to this space. I can't tell you what to expect. Probably alot of just life, like this. Alot of Ava Pearl, b/c well, she's just the cutest thing ever. Most likely alot of oily stuff b/c I'm obsessed and they are some of my best companions for emotional support + wellness. Maybe even some fun DIY's. Who knows. But I do know I'll share the links on my fb when I do post, so just stay with me over there if you don't want to miss one.
QUESTION: Have you felt any huge shifts in your life lately? If so, tell me about the them. I'd love to hear your stories, as if we were sitting across the couch from each other or gathered around a campfire drinking whiskey gingers.